Thursday, August 29, 2013

Writer's Workshop- My mom

Mama Kat's at it again. Stop over here to join in the fun!

Writing Prompts:

1.) Somebody you’d like to hug.
2.) What did not get accomplished this summer that you wish you had time for?
3.) Write a post that incorporates the word: balloon
4.) Something your grandfather told you.
5.) List 7 qualities your mother has that you wish you had too.


My mom is pretty awesome. My husband has joked that he is waiting for me to turn into my mother as is so often threatened of new grooms. He can't wait. He's also said that if anything ever happens to me that he is moving in with my mom or moving her into our house.

The qualities that my mom has that I'd like to have (or that my husband would like to have)

7. My mom and dad never fought. My mom has always said that it wasn't worth it to fight and they could just walk away from each other. My husband and I though, whew, we can clash sometimes. But, we're working on it.

6. It's not a quality, but a talent. My mom is a beautiful crocheter. It amazes me how she can take a pile of yarn and turn it into a gorgeous blanket.

5. She goes above and beyond for people. She's currently crocheting two blankets, both for her church so they can sell tickets on them at the Fall Festival this week. Even before I had kids, my goals for the day were to shower and eat and maybe muddle through work. (Although I do donate a lot of time to my Girl Scouts)

4. She sacrificed her life to take care of my great-grandfather and great aunt. Even though, as a child, I hated it, because it limited what we could do, I understand why she did it when her siblings refused.

3. When she was young, before her crippling arthritis limited her abilities, she cleaned when she got mad. I get mad and go eat a bag of chips.

2. Before the arthritis, she cooked almost every night. I don't remember the last time I actually "cooked" something that required the stove or oven and not just something I could make in the microwave or pizza maker (in defense of the pizza maker, I did use it to bake a full-sized pie for Christmas and it makes great chicken.)

1. She thinks I'm amazing and that I'm good at everything. Need something written? Samantha's great at that. Problem with the computer? Samantha can fix it. Need something filled out? I'll get Samantha to do it, her handwriting is great. She often brags about how smart I am and what a good mother I am and how well I do at work or the things I do with my Girl Scouts. So, even when my self-esteem is circling the drain, my mom get a fish net and scoops it out.

Thursday, August 22, 2013

My 6th grade teacher

Mama Kat's at it again. Head on over here to join in the fun!

This week's prompts:
1.) Your sixth grade teacher.
2.) A blog post inspired by the word: diapers
3.) Open your picture folders, close your eyes and pick a random photo to share and write about.
4.) What is your favorite age? If you could stay that age forever, would you?
5.) List 6 people or things that deserve to take a time out!


When I was in kindergarten, I thought Mr. B was so cool. When our half-day class made ducks out of construction paper, the 6th graders made eggs. Then, a few days later, the eggs hatched and there were a bunch of little chicks running around. THEN, he used a hole punch and black construction paper to made duck poop and came over to tell us that our ducks were pooping everywhere. It was so cool. He did that with other art projects that we hung in the hallway, but the ducks were the most elaborate and by far my favorite.

Mr. B had also been my brother's favorite teacher and his reward system of "auction bucks," which gave you play money for doing well and fines for things like talking in class, not doing your homework etc, was infamous.

So when my parents suggested we move across town into my aunt's larger house, I begged to stay where we were until I finished elementary school, because I just HAD to have Mr. B. Fortunately, my parents agreed. We did some interesting things that year- we made a budget, had a Superbowl pool (Steelers lost to the Cowboys that year, it was a sad day), had auctions with our Auction Bucks and I won an electric pencil sharpener, which was the shit in 1996.

But my 6th grade year wasn't all that I had hoped. My kindergarten teacher wasn't in our school anymore, so the little kids art work hung on the wall, untouched. Oh yeah, then there was the whole, "Mr. B called me a spoiled brat and overall didn't like me" thing. I wrote about the incident where I played lawyer in 6th grade and refused to do a punishment because it violated my constitutional rights the prescribed cafeteria punishments. There was other times where he had told me something similar when I messed up; such as when my friends and I were horsing around and someones chair got pulled out from under him. I honestly don't know what happened, but someone getting hurt was never the intention.

My mom thinks that he wanted my books for in the classroom and she told him no. Do you remember those classroom book orders? Well, my mom used to by me $20-$30 in books, a pop. I loved to read and Mr. B often commented on the number of books that I had and hinted around to my mom about me donating them to our classroom. But apparently, I had seen him throw books away, according to my mom, and I was devastated. "They were perfectly good books and he could have given them to someone to take home, but he threw them away!!" I don't remember any of this, but even now, I think it's senseless for someone to throw books away, unless they have severe damage. So my mom figures that this had a lot to do with his dislike of me. I'm sure the cafeteria incident added to it, but he disliked me before that.

When I started 7th grade in a new school with no friends, I sometimes wished that i had agreed to move when my parents suggested it. It would have been easier to make friends in elementary school, instead of waiting until Junior High, but hindsight is 20/20. The one silver lining is that one of the best, kindest, most caring teachers I've ever had was Mr. P in 5th grade and I would have never had him if I hadn't wanted to wait to have Mr. B. From Mr. P, I learned patience- he never raised his voice at us; I learned kindness- he never called students names; I learned that hard work is totally worth it- he made us write out the questions with the answers and I got All As and 1 B, a big improvement from my first C in 4th grade! Things might not always work out how we plan, but we usually get to where we're supposed to be.


Mama’s Losin’ It

Tuesday, August 20, 2013

A big, fat brick wall

So I joined Planet Fitness back in June and I try to go at least 2x a week (but missed 2 weeks with a foot injury). My husband has signed up and is going with me. He's gone twice and has lost weight. I've been going for the whole summer and I keep fluctuating right around the same 3 pounds. I lose them, I gain them, I lose them, I gain them. It's really frustrating and I need to figure out my food issues and replace them with something healthier. My first small step is going to be to replace most of the coke and mt dew I drink with water. Oh.. And the McDonalds Sweet Tea. I don't know if I have the self control for that....

I started a reward system for my weight loss plan. After I lose 15 pounds, I'm going to get a manicure and then 25 gets me highlights and 35 a haircut. Ive never had my hair cut before. My mom has trimmed it and shortened it, but I've never had a style. I'm starting to feel like I'll never get there.

Thursday, August 15, 2013

Writer's Workshop- Mama said knock you out

Mama Kat's at it again! Stop over here to join in the fun!

This week's prompts:

1.) 10 Things to Smile About (inspired by Things I Can’t Say)
2.) Tell us about a time you wanted to punch someone in the face.
3.) What were you blogging about last year at this time? What has changed?
4.) Share the story behind your current Facebook and/or Twitter profile photo.
5.) Bake something yummy and share the recipe!

I'm forever threatening to punch someone in the face. I have a low tolerance for stupidity and it seems like the people around me have a high threshold for it.

The most recent time I experienced this was 2 weeks ago. My husband and I were taking my 19 year old nephew and his 18 year old girlfriend (who happens to be my best friend's cousin and I've know her most of her life) to see Blake Shelton. My nephew is one of those kids who thinks that he freakin' knows everything, when in reality, he is King of the Clueless. I love him to death, but he'd probably shrivel up and die if my mom didn't keep him alive (like most teenagers). My nephew has been driving us crazy with his inability to take responsibility for himself and his girlfriend also has that teenage quality about her. Unfortunately, you can't really sit down and talk to either one of them about what you expect from them. Nephew thinks he knows it all and you're stupid and will just walk away from you (which really makes you want to punch him in the face) and Girlfriend gets all sad puppy dog on you.

So any-who, we're stuck in traffic. A 1.5 hour drive literally turned into 5 hours. (5 hours where my bladder almost exploded. It hurt worse than a UTI and when my hubs finally stopped, I couldn't stand upright.) So we had lots of time in the car... just the 4 of us... yay... When my husband said something I didn't want the jabberjaws to hear and repeat to the whole freakin' world (like they will), I said to him "the children are in the backseat," to which Girlfriend says "I'm not a child, I'm 18." BOOM! Thank you Jesus, this is my in to talk about responsibility without having to be like, "hey, you guys need to grow up." It could be nice and general. So I say,"Being an adult isn't about age. It's about responsibility. Managing your money, cleaning up without having to be told, working 40 hours a week and going even when you don't want to..." and my @hole husband says, "Oh yeah, you're not an adult then! I pay the bills and I sweep the kitchen and you don't work 8 hour days" yadda yah. Then he says "What adult things do you do!?!" I replied, "Well, for starters, who keeps the Baby alive?" and my Nephew says "Ma." Now granted, my mother does watch Baby while I'm at my 37.5 hour a week, professional, well-paying job with benefits, but I'm her sole caretaker at home. If I wasn't so desperate to get to the concert, I may have killed him there. What the hell was going on in that head of his??? He knew this was a conversation they needed to have, but he couldn't fight the urge to put me down. So, rather than killing him, I just stopped talking, while he and my Nephew chuckled at their perceived funniness. Then Dear old Husband of mine reached over and tickled my belly and said in baby talk "ohhhh, did I make you mad?" And I screamed....


"YES! I'M TRYING TO MAKE A F*CKING POINT AND YOU CAN'T KEEP YOUR MOUTH SHUT!!!!!!!!"

All noise from the backseat ceased. My husband's smile melted and things clicked in his head and he said, "oh." We rode in silence for about 5 minutes when Girlfriend said "If age doesn't make you and adult, what does?" To which I explained about responsibilities and she said, "Oh, then I'm still a kid."

Every time I think about that, I mentally punch my husband in his throat.


Mama’s Losin’ It

Thursday, August 8, 2013

Writing Prompts- my concert

Mama Kat's at it again. Head over here to join in the fun!

The Prompts:
1.) A lesson you learned.
2.) The first concert you ever attended.
3.) Write a post inspired by the word: brave.
4.) 10 Things Will and Kate will need to survive baby’s first year.
5.) First crush.

My first concert. I remember it so well. I was in 4th grade. It was September 8, 1993 at Pittsburgh's Civic Arena. My mom had bought me tickets to see my favorite singer. I was over the moon. I told my whole class. One of the girls wanted me to put her in a suitcase and smuggle her in. Everyone was so jealous because 9.5 year old me was going to see....



BILLY RAY CYRUS!!!!!


Original Source: CMT

no, no, no. Not THAT Billy Ray Cyrus

THIS Billy Ray Cyrus!

Source

Yes, My mom took me to see the tight blue jean wearing, hip shaking, mullet-sportin', Dolly Parton Romeoing, Achy Breaky Heartin' Billy Ray Cyrus. I was the shit, man. We had really awesome seats too. Level B, right next to the stage. We were so close, in fact, that when my mom suggested we wait inside to let some of the traffic leave, we were directly above BRC when he left the building. I was 15 feet above his head. My mom said to me, "yell for him!" and my dumbass froze! DOH! This remains one of my biggest regrets today, because that would have totally made me the most amazing person in my entire elementary school.

But, as it does, the limelight faded for Billy Ray, but he did give us a great line dance, that probably still happens at weddings in some parts of our great country. It almost makes up for the other "gift" he gave us:

Miley Cyrus


Eh, not so much this Miley Cyrus. Although, I did see her emasculate him for a laugh, by pointing out that she was the family bread winner.


No, Billy Ray Cyrus gave us this little twerking, pants forgettin', bong hittin' gem.

 But, what can we expect from the girl who grew up in the Achy Breaky Heart craze?
Mama’s Losin’ It